What else can I do | The Conjure

This may be a long post but it may be the last one too. I left Christianity in Dec 2018 and began a spiritual path. I was first introduced to the Oshun, then the rest of the Orishas. Then I began to read about Hoodoo & began to practice that. I even read some of The Santeria. Last Summer I moved away from where I was living to a new state to start over bc I was just out of a divorce and I wanted things to be better for my kids and I. Later on I discovered The Conjure and began buying and lighting the candles, manifesting what I want but suddenly everything seemed to start and go the other way. A little backstory; I’m an orphan. I was an abandoned child and lived from place to place, being abused just to have somewhere to stay until I was 15 and then I was on my own. I met an abusive man and stayed with him for 10 years bc he was all I felt I had. I mustered up the courage to divorce him bc I was tired of my children seeing me beat up. I thought that I was doing the right thing. He’s a Christian and I am not. He says this is what I get for leaving Christianity. I am currently living in a friends apartment with broken toilets and mold. I just want to be able to purchase a home for my kids bc they don’t deserve this but at this point I am struggling to find the strength to even get up. I’ve never crossed anyone or done anything bad to anyone. My kids don’t deserve a life like this. I don’t have a dime to my name & am dragging through this shit with me & it’s unfair to them. What else can I do spiritually? I’ve done everything that I know how to do and it’s like God, The Universe, The Ancestors and everyone has turned their backs on me. I’m tired and I’m hurting. I remember as a child praying for small things and it never happened. Here I am at 36 years old and I’m as tired as I can be mentally and spiritually. If there is anything that anyone knows that I can do spiritually to turn things around would you please tell me bc honestly I don’t know how much more I can take. I’m terribly embarrassed by this by I don’t have anyone else to talk to or to ask that isn’t a Christian.